There's really nothing quite as nice
As being kissed by lips of ice.
Unless it's a hug from a great pal,
Who bears his teeth, drools and growls.

Edward will always be my guy
Because he taught me how to fly.
Jacob will always be my friend
though he hates the smell of my skin.

Heck, it doesn't even bother me,
That while I'm dining at KFC,
And looking over my shoulder for the Volturi,
Ed's sucking the life out of poor Bambi

Someday when my wish comes true
My skin will also be pale blue.
I'll go out hunting with the Cullen crew
And get my own special "venison stew."

I guess some things are just meant to be
Like Edward, Carlisle, Esme, and me
Except for that gal Rosalie
Who can't even stand the sight of me.

This story only has one fatal flaw;My best friend may become my son-in-law!